“I remember telling my mom that I couldn’t imagine losing my son.”
Daniel’s Story
“Beginning in elementary school, I noticed a difference in saying goodbye to a great Aunt versus saying goodbye to a close classmate who lost her life in a tragic accident. I asked a lot of questions of my parents and teachers. Through Junior High, we were attending a funeral once a year, it seemed. In 9th grade my Grandfather died. My sophomore year, a classmate died. A grandfather-like figure from church died later that year. The end of my Junior year, one of my classmates drowned. The first football game of our Senior year, the quarterback, Frank, died from a heart condition. Sunday after church, I walked down to their house to say I was sorry, and that Frank was a great friend. In that moment, I saw how to share in someone’s suffering in a way that eased the anguish. Share in their lament. Remember their loved one with them. Sit quietly beside them. Bring water and tissues. I remember telling my mom that I couldn’t imagine losing my son. Little did I know 20 years later I would say goodbye, for now, to my oldest son after a courageous battle with melanoma. Then I knew how a broken heart felt. What it feels like for someone to share in your lament. I know how close heaven and God are in that sacred space where great suffering meets the peace that passes all understanding (Phil. 4:7) and where ashes of mourning are washed by the renewing oil of joy. (Is. 61:3).” - Tammie
“First to the ball, last to give up!”
Daniel had an Adidas t-shirt with this saying on it. This really sums up Daniel’s attitude about living and loving God and others. Daniel played soccer from age 5 on and Dean [his father] was his coach during the summer. Daniel was never the most skilled or fastest, but he played with the biggest heart and loved to work hard at being a teammate. My favorite soccer memory of Daniel was when he was 15 and played in a summer league game. He tried a new move on a defender to get past him, and it worked! He was so surprised and thrilled he laughed as he scooted by. Later that summer he tried out for the HS Freshman team.
He was just beginning a regimen of chemo shots at home 3 times a week.
It made him feel like he had the flu. At the end of each practice, the coaches had all the players run sprints. Daniel was consistently the last person. After the tryout he came to the car upset. He decided to let the coach know that he was going to drop out on his own. He wanted to tell the head coach in person on his own, so he went up to the coach before we left. Coach John Mahoney didn’t let Daniel quit and said that he had made the team because he was man enough to come speak to him on his own. Later Daniel told the coach that he was battling cancer. To this day, each fall, John Mahoney reads a description of the player that Daniel was and asks the boys to choose someone to wear Daniel’s number (#3) for the year.
Dean and Daniel often went fishing together.
The two pictures of Daniel by the tree stump were 3 years apart. We all went to that fishing spot a couple days before we went on our “Fish America” RV trip, June 2006. Daniel recognized the stump and wondered if the big fish he caught years before was still there. It was. He was pleased
Old Man and the Sea.
This reminds me of Daniel’s favorite book in high school - “Old Man and the Sea”. I remember the teacher sharing that Daniel understood what the Old Man was grappling with physically and figuratively. He had insights that classmates couldn’t understand. The battle was part of living truly, and Daniel was all in - just like the Old Man.
The best way to get better at anything was to watch experts play.
Yellow was one of Daniel’s favorite colors. He usually wore that hat. When he was sitting still, he played a computer game or watched soccer and hunting/fishing shows with Dean; the best way to get better at anything was to watch experts play. One of his favorite fishing show hosts always kissed the fish before he let it go, so he started doing that as well.
His other favorite color was orange.
A dear friend offered to make bears for each of our kids out of one of Daniel’s shirts. His favorite color was orange and he had two orange fleeces, so we had her make each of his siblings (Alyssa, Abigail, and David) a bear out of the orange fleece.
Daniel saved all of his soccer shirts.
Flower City Work Camp Shirts, Camp Hickory Hill, Christian Service Brigade and soccer camp shirts. My Mom made a quilt for us and pillows for each of us, two of his best friends, and Dean’s parents. There was a shirt that his girl-friend gave him for his 16th birthday. I had it made into a bear for me to keep and remember their friendship - that is the green bear with the blue eyes.
Daniel loved people.
Daniel enjoyed writing stories, journaling, drawing and art just as much as playing soccer, fishing, hunting, loving on little kids, and helping older people. Daniel loved people. Even in the colorful tree painting, his love of hunting shines through. After all, deer season in NYS is in the late fall.
Daniel enjoyed the strategy of hunting and fishing.
You had to know what the animal wanted to eat, when it liked to eat and then wait, patiently, quietly, listening, and watching. He very much related to people much the same way. The parable of becoming a fisher of men was something Daniel could understand. He was maturing into a fine young fisher of men.
Pinewood Derby Cars.
Pinewood Derby was a favorite activity for Daniel with the Boy Scouts and the Christian Service Brigade. Dean always let Daniel lead the way with constructing the car; it was more about the time together than whether he won or lost. Daniel’s cars never won any races but he won the “most creative” award with his Blue “Water Bug” car. He couldn’t have been more pleased.
Lament is where living begins.
I am beginning to realize that the mystery of my story can be solved by studying the history of His story, God’s story. Really, my story can’t be told without including His and those in His family that cross my path. There is comfort in that truth. When you lose someone, your story is forever changed and there is healing that comes in telling their story. Hosting the Daniel’s Race each year helps us to remember, reconnect, and reflect on running the race-of-life the way Daniel did.
Something I never considered until after Daniel died was what Daniel prayed.
Daniel told God three years ago to use him however he saw fit to further the Kingdom of God. I know Daniel was thankful that he had cancer out of all the people in his family; he wouldn't have wanted anyone else to have it. The thought of being a hero in Christ's name was a goal he wanted to attain. I think all of Daniel's prayers were answered.
Hope is what gets me through most days.
Daniel is a part of our past that is sometimes hard to think about, but he is also a very real part of our eternal future. This present is hard, but we can look to the future with hope due to our faith in Christ. It is this hope that gets us through most days; a hope of healing and a future together with our Lord. It is not just a hope of Daniel being in heaven but of Heaven and God and all of us being together in a much happier place, forever. Daniel's life made it very clear to me that what we do here on earth will have a huge impact on our eternal time in Heaven. So, we work to run the race well.
Daniel’s Race.
Daniel fought melanoma for nearly three years. A friend of Daniel's organized the first 5K in 2006 to help the family with medical costs. In the spring of 2006, Daniel ran in the race and completed it despite being in the middle of a series of treatments. Daniel passed away 4 months later on July 12th, 2006. The 5K has continued with the support of our community. Each year the proceeds are given to a family or organization that helps children with life-threatening illnesses while heightening Melanoma awareness.
"Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.” Matthew 6:10
After Daniel’s passing, Daniel’s grandfather wrote a letter. He said, “On May 10th, 2004, Daniel, whom I have always fondly called Danielson, and his parents were informed he had acquired a form of cancer rarely found in one so young. At that time, there was no known cure - no silver bullet. Danielson had six to eight months to live. Nearly, from that moment, the prayers for Danielson and his family, ascending to our Lord, began increasing daily; people of faith around the globe were praying.”
God always answers prayers with yes, no, or wait. - Henry Denman
“We will never know in our earthly lifetime how many hearts were turned to Jesus during Danielson’s two-year battle. One can only guess the number of lives that have been changed through the experience. We do know that over 1,200 people attended Danielson’s funeral and heard the plan of salvation.”
I don’t believe that God answered our prayers with a yes or a no.
“On the contrary, He asked us to do something that is nearly impossible for our culture to do or even desire to do. God asked us to wait. Wait and see Danielson in our heavenly home along with all those that Danielson encouraged to follow Christ. You see, it is our Heavenly Father’s desire that none should be lost, and Danielson said, ‘Yes. Lord, I will help.’ Amen and amen.”
First email sent to Daniel’s prayer chain.
Reflection by: Tammie + Dean Myslivecek.
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